for every good piece, there are several bad

Nothing ever
falls apart
casually

When things
fall apart

They fall apart
so hard

No period
of calm,
just debris
flying every which way,
but up

a cacophony

but that's life.

I understand that
I really do

I've been trying to
be your pillar,
something
to hold onto

what I'm
rapidly beginning
to realize
is that
the trouble doesn't lie
in you holding onto me
but rather
me
holding onto you

each little bit of
distance creeping in
leaves me
at a loss
on how to stop
you from
drifting away
on a current

dorothy and the twister
all over again.
**********************************

(emotional maracas)

it's a good thing
you can't
pick people up
and shake them

to hear them
rattle inside
from all the pieces
broken

it's a good thing
I don't clatter
as I walk
down the streets

giving away
the fact that
I am mangled

I've been
playing
at living
so long

getting by
cause no one
can hear

no one can detect
my fragmentation

it's a fool that swears to you
they can't act.

now that the
time has come
to be everything
I've been
pretending to be
I don't know
where to begin
picking up my pieces

how to fit them together

or how to keep them
from divulging
the truth

when I fall.
**********************************

pushed
to the point of distraction
it's all
bubbling up inside you
isn't it?

I'd resort
to arm chair
psycho babble
to feel like
I know you,
know what's going on

reassure
where there is
not a leg
to stand on

except that
each minute
that ticks by
cracks me open
like a sieve
where every doubt
I keep reined in
begins to leak out

I'm on the bottom
looking up
from a pattern I've already
fallen into.

again.

You'll notice
I'm gone
by the time
it's too late.
**********************************

I hate to ask

really.

One more thing
to add to your plate.

I understand
if you simply
haven't the time

honestly.

being last minute
and all.

but could you
spare a minute

to help me
hold it together?

I'm afraid

if I take one more step
I'll crumble.